:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
