It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
