how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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