another moral hangover. fuck.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Randomize
