Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
