i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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