I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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