you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
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Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
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oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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