Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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