we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize