ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
