Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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