Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize