fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
