You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
What changed your mind?
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is