I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I smell stomach acid.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.