I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Randomize
