"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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