Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
