I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
