I must be too annoying 4 u.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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