He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
