gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
