Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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