and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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