I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
