we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
