Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize