Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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