I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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