I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize