So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You left your phone here
Wait...
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