he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize