question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
