elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize