I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
