david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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