Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
