I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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