But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
What drink are we having for lunch?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize
