Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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