I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
