I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
