Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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