I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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