Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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