doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
