do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
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There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
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There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!