What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
