you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
