I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Randomize
