when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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